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"Strong is the new skinny!"
I hate this phrase. Not just dislike it, or think it is silly. I hate it.
How many times have you heard this? And it is not just one person. Even now I scroll through fitness pages, personal accounts, and "body-positivity" pages, and I see this phrase plastered on bios, post captions, and in backgrounds. It is like some bandwagon that people have jumped on to be like everyone else.
So this is me. Some people may look at this picture and see someone who is skinny, others may see someone who is fit or strong. Maybe you see neither, or you might see both.
I am a perfectionist, probably always have been. Hard on myself, never satisfied with less than perfect. And it has been something I have been slowly letting go of for years now, because what in the world, no one is perfect! No one is perfect. Yes, I meant to write that twice, because we all needed to read that again. So many other people I know struggle with this same problem, and that does not end with our obsession with perfection in the way we look.
When did skinny mean we reached physical perfection?
When did hearing "you are so skinny" get translated in our minds to "you are so beautiful" or "so dang perfect;" and if you don't know what I am talking about, consider yourself lucky. This tune is changing, and I am all about it! It is long overdue to change this narrative.
So you might be wondering, what in the world is wrong with the phrase "Strong is the new skinny" then?
Well I have talked to women, girls, friends and family who unanimously have the same thing to say about this phrase, the same thing I thought when I heard it for the first time, and then kept seeing it, repeated like a bad habit, on fitness pages across instagram and other social media platforms. It makes us feel bad about ourselves, just the same. Especially considering you look at the people who are sharing it, often fit into one of the two categories: skinny or strong. It is easy to share this phrase when you are both strong and skinny. The intention: change the narrative. But all it is doing is changing the "ideal" body type to something else, not eliminating it altogether.
I hope that internally you know that you are beautiful the way that you are. That how "ideal" you are for society will never be based on your physical appearance, and at the very least that you never make other people feel like they are not enough or not ideal.
I hope that someday if I have a daughter, she can grow up without people telling her that her body is not enough, that just because she is not skinny, not physically strong, or is not perfect, that she is anything less than beautiful.
This is me. Fresh off of a workout on a day that was really difficult. To some people, I am skinny, to others, maybe not. To some people I am strong or fit, to others, not even close. Honestly, I see neither a skinny person, or a physically strong person in this photo. I see a person who had a really hard day, trying my best to take care of myself.
I would hope that when you look at this picture, that you would not see that I am someone who is skinny or I am someone who is strong. I hope that you would see that I am someone.
I am someone.
And that makes me (and you) beautiful no matter what I look like.
Insecurities, my own and the insecurities of others, run rampant. And I would hope that I would never fuel that or add to the fire that is comparing your body to others.
"Strong is the new skinny" needs to stop being spread, because honestly, I thought we as women were above putting others down for not looking the way we see as ideal.
Healthy in mind & body is what we should all strive for. But even if we are not there yet, we are no less beautiful.
When I have been my skinniest, I have been the most unhappy and most unhealthy. And I hope that nothing replaces skinny, because in the end it is just as harmful.
There is no "new skinny."
And I beg you to stop spreading this message. It is harmful and puts people down just the same as outright telling them "you have to be skinny to be pretty!" Like no one would ever say that (I would hope) and no one believes that to be true.
Wake up to the reality that you are beautiful inside-and-out, no matter what society, other women, or your own negative thoughts tell you. There is no new skinny. There is no ideal body type or appearance. We all look different and that is amazing! Please be aware of the messages you give to other women, and more importantly to young girls who see you and follow your example. You do not need to be skinny, you do not need to be physically strong, able-bodied, intelligent, athletic, toned, or anything else to be beautiful, seen, and admired. You need to be you. That is what is the most beautiful, the most admirable, and the most authentic.
You are the ideal person. What you look like, and how that appearance will change over the years into new and different forms will be the most beautiful thing of all. We are like flowers, slowly blooming into different versions of ourselves throughout life's seasons. And much of that blooming will have little to do with what we look like on the outside.
So no, there is no new skinny. You are beautiful. And I would hope that someday messages telling you otherwise will be a thing of the past. That people would stop feeding the disease that comparison and body-shaming is. I would hope that someday through our words and the messages we put into the world, that people would know that there is no one way we should look to be beautiful.
"Strong is the new skinny!"
It breaks my heart. There is no "new skinny" there is only beautifully different, and ever-changing and blooming. Our bodies are God's creation, and comparing them or holding one kind to a higher standard than another would be a disservice to His handiwork, some of his most precious and detailed creations.
Body positivity begins the day that we all realize that our bodies are beautiful not based on what they look like, but the life they are carrying us through every day. Don't let anyone tell you that your body is not ideal, or the way you look is or is not beautiful based on the thoughtless words of others.
I hope you feel strong. I hope you feel beautiful. And I hope you feel healthy. But if you don't, you are still beautiful and loved just the same. "Strong is the new skinny" is rooted in appearance and comparison, and I am disappointed that we are not above that by now.
I see you. I appreciate you. Do not listen to those that say there is an ideal body type to be beautiful, plastered on social media and in real life. And at the very least, for the love of God, please love your fellow sister enough to stop being part of the problem.
You are the fearfully and wonderfully made handiwork of God.
I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well. Psalm 139: 14
For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:10
You are a beautifully crafted masterpiece of Christ. Skinny, strong, large, small, tall, short, healthy, or struggling, you are no less than elaborately made, beautiful, and loved for who you are.
For reasons far more meaningful than for something as silly and frivolous than what you look like.
you are blessed. you are gifted. you are loved and appreciated, just as you are.
mindfully, molli
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